4/27/2023

If I don’t speak fear into the room then maybe it isn’t happening. Maybe I get to keep him. I’ve never been ready for these kinds of losses. They’ve always left just as fast as they’ve come. Not him though. I’ve had twelve years of companionship. Twelve years of being loved, cared for, seen, and protected. Why does he have to go? I need him now more than ever. The roles have reversed. I ease his anxiety and fears. I hope to regulate him just as he has for me all these years.

I’m not ready to live with the spaces he will leave in my life and in my heart. It’s selfish to ask him to stay. I know he can’t but man how I wish he could. I would take care of him forever. My King.